Comedian Jessica Holmes says depression made her feel like a ‘cracked doll’

In her new book Depression: The Comedy, Canadian comedian Jessica Holmes looks back at her struggle with mental health and laughs.

It didn’t seem humorous at the time of her depression, a dark span of two years she likens to a “brown cloud.”

“I found the comedy only in retrospect,” Holmes told CTV News Channel’s Marcia MacMillan, recalling a moment when her children posted a “scream chart” to their refrigerator door and would give her an “X” when she lost her temper.

Only when she recovered did she see the humour in that moment, and the humour in her attempts to cure herself with online shopping. “Such a frenzy, literally buying up Blondie’s wardrobe, trying to dress like Lady Gaga, thinking that’s all I need — I just need a pick me up,” she said. “It always just made me feel like a cracked doll.”

In the new book, Holmes looks back at depression with a bit of levity, she says, to show readers struggling with mental health the light at the end of the tunnel.

Now, she’s back on her feet and living life to the fullest. “My life is more full than even before I was depressed,” she said.

Watch the full interview with CTV News Channel above

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